No Boat For Me

I don’t ask for much from life: just some a couple of good friends, a calling that makes me feel like I’m making a difference, and a very large boat that’s all mine. That’s basically nothing! All my friends have boats, and they like nothing better than to rub it in. “Come out boating with …

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Drain Havok

An unfortunate resident in Melbourne’s South-East has been forced to vacate his home after a burst sewage pipe flooded his property. Michael Landry, 64, had long been an avid protester of blocked drains in Melbourne. But it would seem that fate was to have the last laugh, as Landry was woken up on early Sunday …

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You’ll All Sea!

One day, they’ll all see. And when they all see, they’ll all…sea. Hah! Yeah, so, big deal, I tried to activate a crazy device that would not only melt all the polar ice caps at once, but also transform mankind into an aquatic species with gills and flippers. Personally, I don’t think that’s a huge …

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Penguin Capers

You know that feeling when you’re trying to read a book and you keep reading the same sentence over and over again, because you’re tired or distracted? That’s what it’s been like for me, trying to watch Week of Our Lives in the living room. The sun streams in there late in the day, it …

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Changing Human Dwellings

I find these ‘Human Classes’ terribly difficult sometimes. The teacher slaps our hands/tentacles/mandibles with the ruler if we mess up too many times. My homework for the week is to simulate the experience of getting a phone call, and then have a conversation with a  human partner about renovating the bathroom. And it has to …

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Raging at Sunlight

If we could get through one week without some office drama that would wonderful. Sandra is being difficult again, so it must be a Monday. I guess all that money we spent on the best decorative window glass Melbourne has to offer went to waste. I thought it looked really good, as well. It’s one of …

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My Solar Bro

Odd-Match has done it again, oh boy! Look, I’m not the vegan type. I mean, I eat meat gladly and I’ve never thought about the vegan lifestyle for myself, but what I mean is that I don’t tell everyone and their mother about my specific subculture and expect them to all be on board with …

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My OWN Life

Got to say ‘Aquatic Man’ is one of the best sleeper hits of the…well, ‘year’, even though it came out over Christmas. No one has seen it because it was supposed to be a quiet biopic on a man who lives by the sea and just happens to be able to breathe underwater, but then …

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Bathroom Blitz

It looks like Boris is gearing up for one of his homemaking rampages again, and this time he’s got his sights set on the guest bathroom. He insists that my sister will appreciate it when she comes to visit next month, but I know the point is really to scratch his insatiable itch to decorate. …

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