Hey, Glass Smashing Bandit here. How are you all doing tonight? Or today, if that’s when you’re reading this. Whether it’s twenty-twenty or twenty-ninety-nine, I wish you a good time no matter what hour of the day it is. And may you smash some glass in my name, just as I’ll be smashing it in yours.
All right, let’s get down to business. Tomorrow is the first day of filming for Next Top Office and I need to get planning. I was going to improvise the whole thing since that’s done me well enough when it comes to my glass smashing sprees and avoiding those bumbling detectives. But hey, I figure if I’m that great at improvising then I’ll probably be even better with a plan. That’s why I’ve decided in advance to use office glass tinting with my design. Privacy is something everyone values in an office so I’m sure the judges will see it as important. I’m certain that I have a totally unique and different idea happening here.
Even though I don’t know anything about their products or business model, I think it’s great that we’re all doing this for Charity. If the higher powers at Not Flicks have decided it’s important to raise money for them, then I’ll go along with it.
Hopefully, the audience is impressed with my commercial tinting. Across Melbourne, I’m known for destroying glass but over the next few months, I’ll be enhancing it. Of course, I’ll still be satisfying my glass smashing tendencies. After all, I’m sure some of the others are going to do decorative or frosted glass. It’ll be my job to smash it and make sure I stay ahead of the rest.
I’m having a great time in Sweden, Victoria. I’ve already made a friend. His name is Space Wizard and Archerak turned him into a pile of goop the other day. The thing is, Space Wizard is still alive. I keep him in a water bottle and listen to his advice. He’s perfectly happy staying liquified for a while, even though he could return to his physical form. With his help, I’m going to dominate Australia’s Next Top Office.